I Got Domestic Partnered!

Yesterday BB and I got domestic partnered! It was a City Hall affair that involved just the two of us. We ultimately plan to get married and have a ceremony with friends and family and officiated by Rabbi Kleinbaum but that won't be for a few years at least. We're not yet engaged but you'll be the first to know! The rush to get domestic partnered was because I needed to get on BB's insurance! My new job would require me to pay monthly for insurance (30% I believe), whereas being on BB's plan would not. Unfortunately because we are two women we (BB) will be taxed for my coverage as income. This would not be so if we were a man and a woman. The domestic partnership also benefits BB because we live in a rent stabilized apartment and without the domestic partnership BB would not be entitled to my apartment if something should Goddess Forbid happen to me. We started off the day going to a lawyer to begin the process of making wills, something we've had on our "something that would be a good idea to do" list for quite awhile. We went to a lesbian lawyer with two terriers in her big, sunny office. Oh, some really have the life! She wondered why with a savings account of 42 dollars (how embarrassing!) I wanted a will but I really do think it is important. There are many elements to a will that are best not left to chance. I listed Cindy as my decision maker for those possible times when one needs a decision maker other than oneself (I'm not talking about not being able to choose between going out for Chinese or Thai!). I listed my trusted brother David as my back-up should anything ever happen to Cindy (Goddess Forbid!).  After the wills we went to Starbucks where we had a drink and a snack and bemoaned the fact that two guys were each taking up their own table (with none left), and they were not drinking or eating, just sitting talking on cell phones. Then off we went to City Hall. When we walked in we were pointed towards a giant, long auditorium like endless room full of crowds of people, some of whom were dressed in ornate wedding gowns and brides' maid dresses and kids there too. The majority of the people were non-white, and many spoke a primary language other than English. They were here to get married. We were ushered over to a booth where a very friendly elderly fellow asked us what we were here for. BB told him that we would like to apply to be domestic partners. The man said in a sweet, joyous tone, "Have a wonderful life together! Your number is A077!" We took our little tag, as if we were waiting to pick up our bagel order, and went and sat down on some of the endless benches that looked up to screens with numbers on them. We tried to spot other gay couples getting domestic partnerships but that seemed to be the minority. Still it is always fun to say to each other, "Do you think those two women are? The ones with the short hair?" "Maybe" "Oh, no, whoops, a man just held hands with one of them." We also saw a Goth wedding party. Everyone was ultra skinny with long black hair, and one woman wore a tight, shiny black corset over her wedding white. Very cool! Then there were kids with hoodies and backpacks over pastel, stiff wedding garb. City Hall had a gift shop that sold flowers and souvenirs as well as a spot to take family photos. I watched one party of about thirty people get a photo done together. The environment itself was neon lights, drab, over crowded, and loud. It felt a bit like an airport with each group waiting for their number to be called and lamenting how long it was taking.  Each group's tag started with a "C" or an "A."  I believe that we were told that "C" stands for "Chapel" meaning you go into the little chapel with a priest to get married.  I don't know what A stands for, maybe "Asshole" meaning you go to a little driver's license registration-like window and put thirty-five dollars on a credit card and get handed a print out that says "Domestic Partner."  In any case, we were "A.'s" and that's what we did! Our "celebration" seemed to have been that initial contact  with the glorious older fellow who tagged us at the beginning.  In all truth our celebration came afterwards at a $6.95 all-you-can-eat vegetarian Indian buffet.  No complaints here! I guess I was struck at City Hall by how a lot of immigrants and minorities are forced due to finances to marry in such a less than spiritual setting.  Even the chapel felt like a small painted background.  Also being at the mercy of waiting and waiting for a number to come up on a screen to get married does not offer the couple and the wedding party much dignity.  In any case, it was an interesting cultural experience, and BB and I did feel warmly about taking this step as a couple.  We went home and cuddled up in bed and watched a pay-per-view movie, The Family that Preys, with Kathy Bates and Tyler Perry.  It was a chick flick but fun and engaging.  We wore our nose warmers, these funny knitted pieces on elastic bands that cover only the nose.  I had found them online and ordered them for BB as one of BB's Valentine's gifts because BB's nose is always getting cold.  I had ordered two because one billed itself as "cozy and old-fashioned" and the other was described on the website as "sporty and stylish."  I wore the stylish one, a small grey nose covering that seems to confuse our grey cat Phoebe.  She looks at me like, Why does my master now have a grey cat's nose too? We took them off only to eat our microwave popcorn.  I love being domestic partnered!